


We're Not Having Sex

by britishmenaredestroyingmylife



Category: British Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Cowgirl Position, Dirty Talk, Doggy Style, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Sex, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Woman on Top
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-05-09
Packaged: 2018-06-07 06:41:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6791665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/britishmenaredestroyingmylife/pseuds/britishmenaredestroyingmylife





	We're Not Having Sex

“Will you be home tonight?”

I was still staring irritably at the text message five minutes after I’d received it, eyes narrowed, lips pursed.

 _Fucker_.

I sat down on the couch and chucked my phone away for a moment. This nonsense had to stop.

God, he was hot, though.

_No! Bad! Put on your big-girl panties and tell him… tell him…_

I grabbed for my phone. “Yes. But I have to work tomorrow.”

Less than a minute before the response: “I’ll come by early then. Six o'clock? I really want to see you.”

 _I bet you do, you… ridiculously good-looking fuckface._ “I don’t think so.”

“Why not?”

Okay, time to dispense with the delicacy. “Because I’m not having sex with you, Tom. I don’t know what this is, but I know that every time you come over here we wind up fucking, and I’m not in a good place for a relationship right now and you aren’t either and I really don’t like having sex with people I’m not in a relationship with. I’m not a whore.”

“Having sex doesn’t make you a whore.”

“I know that! I’m just saying it makes me feel like a whore because that’s not me. I don’t have sex with guys I’m not dating. So if you come over, we’re not having sex.”

“Okay. Then we won’t have sex. I’ll just come over and we can watch _House_. Or whatever you want. Deal?”

I considered this for a moment. I mean, I wasn’t _that_ weak, was I? As long as he just wanted to come over and spend time with me… “Okay, fine. But I mean it. We’re not having sex.”

“We’re not having sex. We’re just spending time together.”

“Okay. Six o'clock. I’ll leave the door unlocked.”

“See you then. xo”

I looked skeptically at that “xo” before glancing at the clock. It was four-thirty; I had an hour and a half to prepare.

First I examined my reflection in the mirror. Hmmm. Still had my makeup on from the office. A few cotton balls later and bye, Felicia; Tom was getting me barefaced. Running my hands through my hair, I realized it was frizzy and in need of a wash. I grinned. Perfect. Oh, one more thing… I stuck my hand down my panties and felt with satisfaction at least two weeks’ worth of growth.

_Ha! Good luck getting through THAT jungle, Hiddleston!_

I went into my pajama drawer and carefully picked through what I had available.

Hmmm. Bike shorts. Ugly bike shorts! _Outstanding._ That’ll do for underwear… and what about a top? I snorted as I grabbed my oldest, most wrinkled sleep shirt from the furthest corner of the drawer. It had Minnie Mouse on it, her hair in curlers, a cup of coffee in her hand, and big fluffy slippers on her feet. Excellent. Even the cartoon characters on my clothes were in no fit state for anything remotely sexual.

With this armor… I was impenetrable! (Yes, I actually laughed out loud to myself when I thought of that one. Shut up, you judgeroo.)

I wolfed down some reheated Chinese food and plopped myself in front of the TV to await His Majesty’s arrival. I had just started to doze when I heard the doorbell, followed by the sound of my front door opening and closing downstairs.

“Hello?”

“Hi Tom, come on up.”

He bounded up the steps to my living room. His hair was a bit messy and he was clad in jeans and a dark sweatshirt. Still looked like fucking sex on legs. _Asshole_. “Hey Chels.” He grinned at me; if he was thrown by my scruffy appearance he didn’t show it.

“How are you, man?”

“Eh. Tired. Long day. You know.”

“I do.” I carefully moved a few inches away as he planted himself on the couch. “Me too. Sleepy.”

“Good to see you though. Always good to see you.” He leaned over and kissed me.

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck_ …

We parted and he again flashed me that grin. “So. _House_ , or would you rather something else?”

“I’m in the mood for _Bob’s Burgers_.” Carefully chosen in advance, of course. Literally the single unsexiest show in the history of television.

“That works!”

I flipped around on Netflix and picked a random episode. The theme song started playing as he rested his hand gently on my thigh.

I set my jaw, trying to ignore the blooming heat in my girly bits. I kept my eyes fixated on the screen and willed my thoughts to stay there too.

“Warm in here,” he mumbled after a few minutes. I was acutely aware of his hand leaving my thigh as he reached up and removed his sweatshirt.

And _of course_ his t-shirt stuck to it as it came off, revealing that taut tummy and that trail of light-colored hair leading down…

He pulled the t-shirt down and I realized with horror that I was licking my lips the moment I heard his voice. “Not polite to stare, Chelsey.” He laughed and turned back to the TV, leaning backwards.

I growled and lunged for him, kissing him fiercely. He returned my kisses with equal fervor, thrusting his tongue into my mouth and pawing at my sides as though there was nothing at all at odds with my current behavior and what I’d said, repeatedly, before.

Oh, fuck, right! “But… we’re… not… having… sex…” I mumbled between kisses. I dug my nails into his arms as I pulled him closer.

“Nope… no… of course… not…” he breathed as he kissed down my neck. I gasped and shivered with pleasure as he latched onto that one spot he knew drove me wild. His hands were now groping my breasts, which were bare and swinging freely under my shirt.

“Right… because… we’re not having sex,” I groaned.

“Absolutely… not,” he agreed breathlessly as he grabbed my ass with both hands and pulled me onto his lap.

I grabbed onto his hair and pulled his head back and started sucking on his neck. “Oh Chelsey…” he murmured.

“Mmm, Tom, _fuck…_ ” I moaned into his skin.

“We’re not having sex, though,” he whispered.

“No… we’re definitely not having sex,” I replied as I straddled him and ground my core downward onto the growing bulge in his jeans.

“ _Fuck_.” God, his stupid fucking voice was enough to get me dripping, and let’s face it - I’d been wet pretty much since he walked in. In this way, unfortunately, the bike shorts were doing me absolutely no favors, as there was a growing damp spot that his fingers were now exploring. I kissed my way back up to his lips and he grinned and chuckled. “But we’re not having sex, right?”

“Right. I mean… well… not at this moment.” I leaned my forehead against his and started laughing. “We’re about to, though.”

“Oh are we?” he replied, his fingers still teasing me through the Spandex of my stupid shorts. “I thought I was told in _no uncertain terms_ …”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, Tom…”

“And the show’s just getting good! Don’t you want to keep watching - _oh_ …” I’d stood up and unceremoniously stripped the shorts off, and he got a look at my unkempt nakedness underneath. I threw off the shirt as well and jumped back on top of him.

“Sorry… I didn’t shave… I meant it when I said… we weren’t… well… at least… I meant it at the time…” I muttered as I continued to ravage his mouth with kisses.

He was unzipping his jeans as he replied. “Actually… it’s fucking hot… that you’re that turned on that you don’t care…”

“I just hope it doesn’t bother you… _ah!_ ” I cried out in anticipation as I felt him slip his length just through my outer folds, pushing his dripping head against my clit before withdrawing.

Then there was that wicked laugh that made my toes curl. “There’s nothing on earth that could bother me right now, Chelsey…” He grabbed my head and forced me to look him right in the eye. “I’m about to fuck you, and I plan to make you _scream.._.”

With that, he thrust up into me all at once and I fell forward, face-planting onto his shoulder. “ _Oh, fuck me!_ ”

“I am, darling,” he answered with a dark laugh as he thrust upward again and pushed his pants down further. He settled back down, only halfway inside me, staying maddeningly still for what my brain determined was far too long - so I braced my hands on his shoulders and sank down on him all the way, swirling and wriggling my hips quickly.

“ _Yes… yes… yes…_ ” I could hear myself chanting as, in the distance, the logical part of my brain screamed profanities at me for once again succumbing to my baser instincts.

“You need to _slow… down_ …” he murmured, grabbing my ass firmly with those big hands and holding me still, his tip still just inside me.

“Ugh… you just feel so _fucking_ good,” I whined.

“Mmm… been awhile, then, darling, since you’ve had some good cock?” I squeezed him with my inner muscles in response, and his eyelids fluttered shut for a moment. “I’ll take that as a yes…”

“Please Tom,” I panted. “Please. Fuck me. Hard.” I pressed my lips to his ear. “Make me take all of that dick… you know you love it when I take that dick… don’t you, baby?”

His ragged breathing was really all the response I needed.

“ _Come on, Hiddleston. Fuck this tight pink pussy until blow your whole fucking load in me, I want to feel it, Tom, I want to feel you running down my thighs when you pull that dick out, don’t stop fucking me, Tom, give it to me good, make me come all over your cock…”_

He snarled and pushed me to the side of the couch. He stood, his cock proudly erect and glistening with my arousal as he pushed his jeans all the way off and stripped off his t-shirt. “On your hands and knees, Chelsey.”

I obeyed, facing the back of the couch and arching my back so that my ass was level with his groin.

He leaned over me, again teasing me, rubbing his cock just outside of where I wanted him. His chest and belly pressed into my back as he kissed my neck… then, in a dark, predatory whisper… “ _Say it…_ ”

“Fuck me, Tom,” I whimpered.

“You can do better than that, love… I want you to _beg,_ Chelsey…”

“Fuck me, Tom!” I shouted, my frustration growing.

He rubbed his tip back and forth over my swollen clit.

“I want complaints from the neighbors, Chels… I want them to hear you beg for my cock… so they all know what a little slut you are…”

 _Christ_ , he was good… too fucking good… he knew all my buttons and just when to push them. My body trembled with need at those words and I obeyed. “ _Fuck me, Tom, please, please fuck me!”_ I screamed.

The scream became louder and incoherent as he rammed inside of me, grabbing my hips hard enough to leave bruises as he took me hard and fast. I cried out anew with each thrust, leaving any neighbors unlucky enough to be within earshot no doubt as to what was happening inside my apartment. He smacked my ass with relish as I buried my face in the couch cushion, shaking with pleasure as I neared climax.

“How’s that… _darling?_ ” he hissed, punctuating each word with a grunt. “Do you like this cock? Yeah? Take it… tell me… are you going to come for me?”

“ _Yes yes yes yes yes…_ ”

“I want you to scream it!” he shouted, his voice strained as he sped up.

“ _Yessssss oh fuck YES!_ ” My body was wracked with tremors as I came, and I collapsed in a twitching heap against the back of the sofa. He held my hips up for another moment as he buried himself inside me as deep as he could once - twice - and then that desperate, almost helpless-sounding _“Ah… I’m coming!_ ” which made my inner muscles contract one last time as he spilled inside me.

For a minute there was nothing but our labored breathing; then he wrapped his arms around me and gently maneuvered himself so that he could lie on the couch beside me. I could feel him softening inside me and the wetness between my thighs, but I was too worn out and satisfied to give a damn.

“Tissues…” he muttered, looking around slowly.

“Scotchgard,” I answered.

We both giggled.

“Don’t get too used to this, Hiddleston…”

“No, no, of course not…”

“Because the next time you come over… if there _is_ a next time… we are definitely… 100%… absolutely… not having sex.”

He kissed my cheek. “Of course, darling. Anything you say.”


End file.
